Getting Better All the Time

I am starting to feel like a broken record because I say the same thing every week - Abby just keeps getting better! I look forward to each new week and the new things that she figures out. This week she was able to sit all by herself! She still props herself up with her hands, but she doesn't have to lean on anything for support. Amazing! (side note - Abby was 6 months old when she learned to sit the first time around, and it has been 6 months since her surgery this time around. I thought that was cool.)

She has also been getting up onto her hands and knees. She does it over and over again when she is on the floor. As I watch her do it I can just see how much she wants to move - and she is determined to figure it out. She is pretty good at the army crawl (scooting on her stomach), but I can tell that just isn't good enough for her. I love that about Abby. She has ALWAYS been very opinionated, stubborn, and somewhat strong-willed. These are the kind of qualities that are going to get her through this (I used to just think those were the "undesirable" qualities that she acquired from me...). Her determination amazes me.

Abby's swallowing is getting much quicker too. That is very exciting! It still takes her 2 or 3 swallows to clear her mouth, but they are much more timely now. We are going to make sure that she has at least one serving of something to chew each day so that we can work on that part of eating. She is amazing with purees, but needs some work with the soft solids. Practice makes perfect, right?

She is still throwing up though. I spoke with her GI doctor and found out the results of her stomach emptying test. A normal emptying rate would be 50% after 30 minutes and 100% after an hour. Abby's stomach had only emptied 36% after an hour. That's pretty slow. There are a few things that can be done to help speed up digestion, but her GI wanted to start by trying her on a different formula. This formula is more concentrated so she could get the same amount of calories with less volume. I thought that would be perfect until I realized that we would have to DOUBLE the amount of water that we give her in order to maintain hydration. Water empties quicker than formula, but since she has to get so much of it, her stomach is NEVER empty and she is still throwing up. Bummer. We will probably have to put her on another medicine.

It really is wonderful to see Abby getting so strong and doing new things with her body. It is also funny to see different parts of her personality shine through her actions. I took her to the pediatrician for her yearly check up and she was so funny while we were waiting for the doctor to come in. I had her on my lap so she could get out of her chair and as soon as she saw the steps that lead up to the exam table she started squirming to get down. So I took her over to them and helped her climb up to the top. Then she saw the doctor's stool and started reaching for it. As soon as she got close enough she started spinning the seat. She was doing exactly what she would have been doing if none of this had happened. I just wish we could see her personality in her face. That is the one area that has seen no improvement. The rest of her body is progressing exponentially, but nothing has gotten better with her face. She doesn't smile, laugh, cry, or talk - except for some yelling when she gets mad. I have been thinking about trying to contact her surgeon from San Diego to see what he thinks about that. We have seen all of the things that he told us to expect after the surgery, but he never mentioned anything about her face. Maybe he has some ideas.

I had an "A-ha!" moment a couple days ago. I was in the living room with Abby and Spencer (Anthony was in the kitchen washing dishes - oh, I love that man!). Abby was in her chair during a feed and Spencer was just being silly on the floor. He was playing peek-a-boo and throwing himself on pillows. I would tickle him and make him laugh, then say something to Abby, who was watching us, and I somehow felt that she was included in our fun. I have spent a lot of time feeling sad about her not being able to play with her brother or have a good time. But at this moment there were no sad feelings. All I felt was JOY. Have you ever had an experience where you just step back and think that things couldn't be any more perfect than they are right at that moment? That's what I felt. Heavenly Father has blessed me with two beautiful, HEALTHY children. I have a responsibility to nurture and teach them, and in return they bring me a kind of happiness that could be experienced NO OTHER WAY. Sure, one of them has had some setbacks, but she is still Abby. I have always thought of her as being older than she really is. To me she has always been very mature. But I think that is where my problem lies. I keep thinking she must be so depressed because of all the things she CAN'T do. But she is only 3 years old - she doesn't think like that! I'm sure she is well aware of the things she can't do, but I know she doesn't dwell on them - instead it gives her motivation. She can have a good time with Spencer even if she isn't the one making him laugh. She still feels included in things and that makes me happy.